All righty then. I have news. I saw Dr. Peter Jheng, the oncologist, last week. I like him and sense that he is very capable and caring. Sally told me that her friend Peggy's husband saw him for his cancer treatment and they were very pleased. Shirley Harless said the her husband also saw him and he was trying some treatments that seemed to be helping but it was too little too late. She was positive about him. He examined me, felt that all in all I will do well. The cancer is definitely a stage 1, very tiny and very treatable. He drew a picture and honestly the tumor is smaller than this -o- He says unless they find lymph nodes involved the treatment will be removal and after the wound heals 6 weeks of daily radiation treatment. Then I will take a daily pill of tamoxofin for 5 years. It is a preventative drug.

I was supposed to see the surgeon the next day but they called from her office and rescheduled because she had to do an emergency surgery. I will see her on Tuesday, June 1.

Sally and I went to the casino instead which would have been a lot more fun if I hadn't lost $$ grrrrr :(

Dr. Jheng told me that there is a shuttle that drives from the cancer center so at least I won't have to drive myself or ask people to drive me. I couldn't find anything about the shuttle on the United General web site so I called Cindy and she says that she believes there is one that volunteers drive. I had an even better idea though, and that is staying with Cindy for the duration or much of it. The idea of spending 2 to 3 hours on the road every day is such an awful idea. I might need to do that part of the time but Cindy lives about 3 miles from the cancer center. It just makes more sense to me. Best of all, Cindy loves the idea. I actually think it would be fun :D

It was back to work today and I was very open about my situation. Everyone was very kind and caring. Tristy Nielsen gave me some great information and advice. There is a cancer hot line at Fred Hutch that will answer any question that you have. Her best friend trained for the last 8 or 9 months to man the phones there. She has been an RN for years and says that it is a great service and they have the most current information to share. Tristy also advised that I take someone along when I go to the the oncologist and the surgeon so they can take notes. Colleen Worth also recommended this and since I respect both of these women so much I am going to ask Sally or Maryann to do this for me.

No one called to set up an appointment with the oncologist today. If they haven't called by Wednesay I am going to call Kubisty's office and ask them what to do. I just want to get on with this and get it over with.

05/16/2010

Much to my surprise my breast biopsy came back positive for cancer. This so pisses me off. How dare my body betray me like this? How dare my instincts be so wrong? I don't care if the nodule is tiny...smaller than a centimeter. I don't care if it's very treatable. It just pisses me off. I don't want to deal with more doctors, more appointments, more procedures or more medicines.

That said I ask you Lord to forgive me for being ticked off. I am thankful that you have given the medical world the knowledge and ability to find this cancer and treat it. I thank you Lord that they have found this so early and I thank you for my friends and family who support me and love me. Help me to remain strong and positive on this new journey I am about to take.